A new beginning?

During 6 weeks I will share with you in various posts my visions, fetishes, ideas, etc. to help you have a better understanding of my universe.

To But first, I need to introduce myself and explain why I decided to give myself into that crazy and un-predictable lifetime project.

Let me introduce myself. I’m just an human in her mid-thirties, that know for years she needed to live in a fetish and BDSM way.
In a gender way, I discovered a few years ago that due to a genetic condition I got birth as a true intersex (hermaphrodite) and that due to “normality” doctors randomly chosen to make me a male by removing the female genitals (only one ovary have been left).
When I discovered that I understood many things about me and seen that my life started with choices from others, without any consent (in the name of society norms). It made me also understood why I always felt trap in a body that was not working like others and also why I was not thinking like others.
But with time all that made sense and this is why I’ve always been the perfect candidate to a such crazy and extreme project.

For more than 15 years I have been evolving into the fetish and BDSM scene, I even used to get really integrated into it and known for latex designs or photography, but once again all that I was doing where for others and rare are the persons that understood that, pushing me to live in a tasteless life.
My relationships and experiments always shown me that I was made to serve others and at some point I finished by accepting a normal and balanced relation will never exist (at least for me).
The rest of my old life is not of any interest as we don’t need to live in the past but for the present and future, so here in this case of my rebirth in this new slave / doll / toy life.

Most of you will ask me what I tried and to be honest I tried a lot, and nothing really stoped me. Both physical and psychological experiences made me want to explore them further and becoming a creature / toy / doll people would fantasise to use but normally never get.
By dehumanising myself and becoming a slave I’m offering you a way to think of your real pleasure and live it without boundaries or conventional society rules.

The build your doll project took life 10 years ago, and made me discover some wonderful peoples and live so fabulous moments, but it also made me see how our society was deciding for everything and giving limits and boundaries all the time.
To be honest and because I questioned a lot myself of my life, and while I some of my friends prefer to end their life, I always have been thinking that I needed to use this precious gift and give it a meaning. If we got birth there is maybe a reason after all !
All started by a constatation : we only have one life to live and all of us keep limits not living it to her full potential. For me I even understood that I started my life by having others taking decisions for me, so why don’t I embrasse my true self and live a different life while offering others an evasion and to fulfil their fantasy and make them into a reality.
Offering myself could look simple at first sight, or even fun, but did you imagined all the consequences it will have? Yes I accept to be owned and giving myself to someone that will make me nothing more that a slave. Yes it will be hard and at some point it may be non consented anymore, but for me this is the beauty of all that project.
For me starting this life is nearly a no way back situation, and my experiences with the build your doll project made me understand that even the most motivated persons weren’t fully ready to see their life impacted by this project. This is why I always tried to see through all the contacts I got if they will accept that it won’t be fun everyday and that owning someone is not made for everyone. Honestly I don’t want to be dropped on the side of a road because it created a family conflict or any situation my owner is not able to face.
But all those experiences made me sure of one thing : this is my destiny !

You may find this jump into slavery extreme, but if you think of “normal” life, we already living it daily, having to work, accepting things due to the morals, entrapping ourself in a life with no more pleasure because of someone else (like a wife, or kids)…
And contrary to all expectations, in this project I’m now seeking any destruction but construction ! (ok I agree that BDSM may be difficult to understand and the non consensual way it may take could say the opposite).
Sure not everyone will agree, but at least some will love it and I will be happy to been used for their pleasure and enjoyment.

Some of you asked for my name, or details of what I like, what I do… but I’m not here to impose any choices I made by the past, and by the side I’m already imposing already a lot by giving the direction of my future condition of becoming a slave and to be mold into the ultimate sex doll.
On a second thinking by populating this website with galeries, writings I will really give options, just hope your dreams will keep it always unpredictable !

This all made me re-think of the basis of the project, and this is why I wrote those lines as the first post.
To have some good fondations, I can’t be dependant of some only one owner, first because I don’t want to put her/him in an inescapable position. I’m the one accepting this position and choice of life, not the person who own me.
The best way to avoid this problem will be to get a group of peoples as owner. This way, peoples can freely enter or live the group and never live me un-owned or in a destructive situation.
How will it work? good question, and I already know it will evolve on time so let’s start here and see where all this goes.
The group will legally bind me to them so that way it will be clear that I will become they slave, but after it will be up to them to decide how it need to evolve to always push this project further.
Some of you will think to the risks I will be exposed to, but once again the group is here to protect me as not only one person may be able to decide for the important choices that will be made to transform me.

The journey I’m starting will be long and the transformation will take time, but this is why I want all of you to be able to interact into the process and help in the decisions that will be taken for my psychological and physical transformations.

At least when you will read those lines I hope you will understand that no one pushed me or influenced me to get into that lifetime project.
I started it by myself after have all the risks and consequences calculated and accepted, so no one could be blame for anything that will happens from this point.

The only limit is that I will never engage in any activity with some un-willing or not in the position to conscent participant. This is a legal safeguard, as most living creatures didn’t want to be involved or are not in the potion to be involved into this alternative life.
This project purpose is to offer entertainment and pleasure, and not creating problems !
No others limits will be given except to give my life a meaning.

I really hope all of you will love to use, participate or even just watch me evolve and becoming the best slave and sex doll you could imagine.

An amazing comic page Kats Candy specially made for me 6 years ago.
I can see that my desire haven’t been changing, I always crave to become this doll…

Stay tuned ! next post will be soon online.

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